The school year is rapidly coming to an end. For many this brings excitement about summer plans which may include travel, seeing friends and family they do not see during the year, attending a fun new camp, or spending time at home. For others, this may be a tumultuous time which may include job changes, moving homes, schools and/or cities. Emotions rise for almost everyone in schools around this time of year, students are anticipating their next year (going to the next year group, moving to Primary or Secondary, or graduating and moving to University) and teachers and school staff are ready for a break from the rewarding but exhausting task of educating students.
International schools are also unique as there is often a consistent percentage of families/staff who come and go each year. In every school at this time of year, there are two distinct groups of people: Leavers and Stayers. For those leaving YCIS, this will be an emotional time, regardless if they are moving across the world or down the street. They need support as they begin to say their goodbyes, plan celebrations and look ahead to their next chapter in life. It should also be recognized that those staying need support too! Although most of us are used to the rapid change in international schools, it still deeply impacts us. Relationship dynamics can change, negatively or positively, as we all prepare for the Leavers to leave and the Stayers to stay. In light of this, it would be beneficial to recognize a few things about our YCIS families, whether Leavers or Stayers.
- Be gentle with one another – Students and their families may be experiencing additional stress due to either leaving or staying preparation, planning for the summer or tackling end of year school details. Recognize that everyone has a lot going on and this directly impacts how they react to others.
- Monitor emotional reactions – Children may be more emotional at this time as they may have difficulty with transitions, become worried, sad or stressed. They may be more emotionally and behaviorally reactive and may need help to take a break or have a discussion about what they are feeling.
- Recognize loss – whether a Leaver or a Stayer, there is loss. This can lead to emotions of sadness, confusion or stress. Feelings of loss often bring up previous emotional times in our lives when we have experienced loss. Help children to accept that they are experiencing loss and help them express those feelings. It can help to write a thank you note to a friend or a teacher who is leaving, spend time with a parent/friend or use other healthy coping strategies.
- Stay connected – sometimes when people are leaving, people pull away from relationships (both leavers and stayers) to protect themselves emotionally from the pain of saying goodbye. This is a good time to tend to those connections. Help your child connect with friends or help them recognize that relationship dynamics can change during transitions and asking what your child needs at this time to feel better about the changes.
- Celebrate – attend end of year celebrations and parties, give and/or receive small gifts or notes of appreciation and friendship. It is also good to recognize growth of your child or family through this last school year and what lessons you have to look forward to this summer and into next year.
Year-end school transitions can create emotional waves, within friendship groups, the classroom and at home. It is during these times it is important to ensure the use of healthy coping techniques and validate emotions of both Leavers and Stayers. YCIS is here to support the transitions of those moving up, moving on or moving forward in our community. Enjoy the last month of school!
Renee Brossman
Puxi Secondary School Counsellor